


Your Only Doll

by neednot



Category: Jessica Jones (TV)
Genre: Gen, Oneshot, Songfic, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, one-sided
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-05-08 21:10:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5513435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neednot/pseuds/neednot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"And what can I do with a girl if she refuses to be mine?"</p><p>One-sided Kilgrave/Jessica, based off Laura Marling's song "Your Only Doll."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

> _I fell into the street_  
>  Poison in my veins,  
>  Clambered to my feet,  
>  And into the night again  
>  Back to my home,  
>  Back to my owner   
>  who screams at my tardiness,  
>  Put his hands to the sky,
> 
> _And says,  
>  "What can I do with a girl if she refuses to be mine?"_

She almost got away.

She made it out of the hotel, past the front desk clerk and the doorman and the valet smoking a cigarette outside.

He was getting careless. 

He'd forgotten to tell her to stay. 

She wipes her lipstick with the heel of her hand and spits on the ground, rips the shoes off her feet, head still fuzzy from the alcohol he kept making her drink at the restaurant. 

Fuck him. 

She wants to rip off the dress, dig her nails into the fabric and relish the sound of chiffon tearing, she wants to. 

But that would attract attention, and she can’t attract attention, not now.

But she’s done playing dress-up.

She runs, and she makes it almost a block but then she hears his voice and she isn’t quick enough and she turns and— 

there

he 

is. 

She had been so close, so goddamn close to getting away and shit, there he is and the second he opens his mouth--

"Jessica!" 

She runs.

But some idiot’s left a broken bottle on the sidewalk and she steps on it and down she goes, fuck, sprawled on the sidewalk like a goddamn drunk who can’t get her bearings. 

He'd drugged her. Christ that’s why her head feels so fuzzy. 

Not like he needs to, not when he can tell her to do anything and she’ll obey— 

(She thinks maybe it’s more fun this way for him. More fun if she puts up less of a fight.)

But she’d watched him hand her the drink and sure, he guided her hands like puppet strings but her hand had picked it up and poured it down her throat, so whose fault was it? 

Puppet strings, doll parts, dresses and makeup and a body for him to do whatever he pleased with. That's all she is. 

She’s beginning to think that’s all she’ll ever be. 

He picks her up, talks to her in that soothing tone that makes her feel like a child and yet, comforts her, and she fucking hates herself for that.

“Oh Jessica,” he says, picking her up, letting her lean on him. “You know it’s useless to run, don’t you?” 

 _I know it’s useless to run_ , she thinks. 

He takes her back to the hotel, limping, tells everyone to forget her face and ignore the blood dripping from her foot, tells them not to disturb them. 

Anger flares in her gut at that because God, he could have just put the damn sign on the door, he doesn’t need to show off  _all the damn time._  

But she’s too sleepy to be angry, too drained, head still fuzzy and her foot throbbing.

He shuts the hotel room door, holds her close to him. 

“Jessica Jones,” he chuckles. “Whatever am I going to do with you?” 

 _Nothing,_ she hopes. _Nothing just leave me alone._  

But something dims in his eyes and his tone turns darker. Commanding. “Clean yourself up. Put a different dress on. And don’t forget you’re mine.”

 _I’m yours,_ she thinks. 

And she limps into the bathroom, bandages her foot, brushes her hair. Winces at her own reflection as she pulls a different dress on, because all she is—

is puppet strings and doll parts.

 


	2. Chapter 2

> _In his bed I am queen, unobtainable me_  
>  Sexual being, human with feelings  
>  The two are not me  
>  The two will not be mine
> 
> _And what can you do with a girl  
>  If she refuses to be mine?_

She lays there. 

Lays there lays there lays there and hopes he doesn’t tell her to enjoy it because then she’ll have to. 

She pretends to be the doll he wants her to be. She makes herself blank and featureless and emotionless inside and on the outside she smiles because he tells her to. She separates herself, the Jessica in her head and the one lying on the bed with him over her, crushing her. 

She hopes one day he’ll get tired of playing with her. But right now she is his favorite toy and god she almost hopes he breaks her soon, finds some flaw, something wrong that shatters her where he can’t put the pieces back together. 

When he is done (thank God it doesn’t take him long this time,) he tells her to clean up.

“But stay in my sight,” he says, and she knows he’s learned from his previous mistake. 

She curses inside her head. She does what he wants, her back to him, and then excuses herself to the restroom. 

Maybe he’ll fall asleep soon. There’s not a chance in the world he’ll let her leave again, not a chance he’ll slip up. 

Three months. 

She’s been doing this three months (though saying she’s doing it implies she has a choice, and fuck that), and she has never hated herself more than she does right now. 

God if she could cut her strings she would. But his grip on her is too tight, and she’d get tangled in the strings if she tried.

“Come back in here,” he calls, and she splashes water on her face and heads back in the hotel room. 

If she’s fast, could she grab the bottle of wine, smash it over his head before he has a chance to tell her not to? 

He’s sprawled on the bed when she returns, shirtless, and she fantasizes about breaking the bottle of champagne and leaving a scar right between his ribcage. 

She is not his. She isn’t, she isn’t, she isn’t. She won’t be.

But right now, with him still lying there, smirk on his face, with her throbbing foot reminding her of her mistake and her head clouded and her will almost, almost broken— 

she forgets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may continue this if there are interests/suggestions, but right now I'm blocked as to what to add.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not normally a songfic girl but this song incredibly fits his control of her.  
> Song here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CasI839YnDY


End file.
